Aloha~
Akhirnya gw balik lagi setelah berbulan2 nggak update blog ini.
n buat selanjutnya, gw bkl nulis pake bahasa ibu pertiwi, Indonesia ajah =P

wokeh.
kembali ke topik yg membawa gw nyasar ke blog ini lagi. *halah*
yaitu..tentang sifat.

Makin bertambah umur membuat pikiran gw makin terbuka. In other words, makin dewasa.
Dewasa yang gw maksud adalah gw makin nyadar ttg apa aja sifat2 gw, baik positif n negatif.
Itu juga pengaruh dari adanya matkul CB juga sih :D

So, positive vs negative.
Positive is positive, negative is positive. *maksudnya?*
Both positive and negative could be positive. Menurut gw, paling nggak.
But in other case, positive and negative could be negative.
Tergantung orangnya juga sih.

Waduh. Kok gw jadi pusing sendiri yah.
Pas nulis fanfic gw bisa bikin alur n topiknya statis, eh begitu nulis yg kayak gini malah jadi ngolor-ngidul. Moga2 aja pembaca ga ikutan pusing.

Berpikir positif. Itu yang penting. Dengan berpikir positif, segala hal bisa jadi positif.
Ada masalah? Bisa diselesein dgn mudah.
Ada kesenengan? Jadi makin seneng dong.

Tuh kan, lagi2 gw ngaco. Topik gw yg sebenernya bukan itu sih.

Yang sebenernya: gw lagi bermasalah ama pengontrolan sifat negatif gw.
Argh. Sampe kesel sendiri kadang2 tiap tanpa sengaja gw melakukan suatu hal yang negatif. Bukan nyolong ato kriminal loh. Gw bukan maling.
Misalnya, gw tanpa sadar ngelakuin sesuatu yang saat gw ngelakuinnya gw ngerasa itu wajar2 aja, eh setelah gw ngelakuinnya malah gw ngerasa kalo tindakan gw itu udah ngeselin orang lain.
Well, regret is always late, right?

Gw bingung banget sekarang.
Gw tau kalo mengubah sifat negatif yang selalu keluar tanpa sadar itu susah banget.
Kalo pake teori sih, bisa aja dengan gampang bilang kalo ngubah sifat negatif itu bisa pelan2... dimulai dari mengenal diri dll.
Tapi, gw tetep aja ga ngerti.
Is there somebody who can help me?

Then... untuk semua orang yang sudah jadi korban atas tindakan2 gw yang mungkin udah ngeselin kalian, gomen ne.. mianhe.. sorry..
Sungguh, bukan itu maksud gw yg sebenernya.

TBC to next post~

Oke.
Gw sekarang lagi ga mood bgt buat nulis dlm Ing.

langsung ajah~

Nasib UTS

Nilai UTS gw, HAMPIR semuanya A.
B.Indo dapet 95 (kalo g salah, gw ga bisa buka binusmaya yg lagi nge-lag2nya cos lg UAS n baru ada pengumuman jadwal kuliah sem 2).
Algo... 75.
jujur, gw ga puas ama nilai algo ini.
tapi, 75 pun termasuk bagus krn temen2 gw bnyk yg dapet di bwh 60.
BAHKAN, si Randi -yang selalu gw tanyain ttg algo- dapet kecil.
SHOCK!
gw ga puas..., tapi kalo gw sedih2 ya lebih miris nasib tmn2 gw.
kalo menurut gw sih..., tu Dosen -yang kabur ninggalin Binus ke Untar jadi skrg dosen algo gw ganti- entah krn ga punya waktu buat nimbang2in utk nambahin nilai bagi yg dapet merah, entah krn ada 1 temen gw yg GEDE banget nilainya..., 97.. yang jelas, gw udah SENSI ama tu dosen!
udah ngajar kaga jelas..., kabur2 segala..., mending juga kalo abis dy kabur, nilai UTSny dikasi gede2. lha ini malah dikasi kecil2 semua.
ZZZ...

MENYEBALKAN!

alhasil, gw skrg kudu perhitungin nilai brp buat jadi target gw UAS ini.
kemaren gw udah sempet ngitung2 nilai pratikumnya... tp meski nilai pratikumny gede, tapi presentasi nilai pratikum dlm nilai MK ALGORITMA seluruhny cuma 30%.
jadi... yang penting tetep teorinya dong.
gw juga ngitung2..
brp IP yg bakal gw dapetin kalo misalnya 6 SKS algo gw dapet B.
ternyata...dpt 3,7!
ga bakal dapet beasiswa dah.
itupun dgn asumsi MK2 gw yg laen dapet A semua.
Aish.
MK yg gw udah yakin dapet A (berdasarkan yg udah UAS): Bing, Alin, Matdis.
PTI yang baru UAS hari ini pun gw ga yakin bisa A. soalnya gw ngarang semua tadi. wakaka...
kalo indo..., kalo emg kebaikan hati sang dosen sama spt waktu UTS, kemungkinan besar gw dapet A juga.
kalo algo...(besok lusa), GA TAUK AH!
gw udah pasrah ama algo. serius.
gw sih bakal belajar..kalo ga nguasain algo gmn ntar blj yang lain di sem slnjtny?
tapi...yang bikin gw sebel itu, kalo bahan yg gw pelajarin mati2an malah keluar sedikit di soalnya. yang bnyk keluar malah yg gw ga pelajarin bener2.
duh2...jangan menganggap mahasiswa itu semuanya punya otak dewa dong. otak beneran pecah kalo disuruh ngafalin semua kodingan. GILA!

Oke2.. mungkin tulisan gw di atas bener2 nunjukin kalo gw itu perfeksionis.
tapi, bgtulah sifat gw.
kalo gw dapet lebih gede dr org lain...gw bakal seneng.
kalo ada yg lbh gede drpd gw.. n org itu tipe yg nyimpen kepinteran sendiri alias ga mau ngajarin orang...ITU YANG BIKIN GW SEBEL! (ada loh org kyk gitu...CIH!)
n gw paling ga bisa yang namanya berakting pura2 seneng ama hasil gw yang menurut tmn gw udah bagus padahal mnrt gw belom bagus!
trus gw juga ga bisa berakting "gw ga bisa bener nih ngerjain ujiannya..kayaknya gw bakalan dapet kecil deh" padahal gw bisa. kalo gw bisa ya..gw bakal senyum2 sendiri.
gw juga ga suka ama orang yang udah berakting -atau emang sifat dy kyk gitu- pura2 ga bisa padahal waktu dapet hasilnya, nilai dy perfect.
gw ga bermaksud sombong, tapi buat org yg punya sifat kyk gitu...cb pikirkan gmn perasaan org yg udah seneng ngira nilainya bakalan gede eh malahan nilai lo yg lebih gede. miris rasanya.

So, jujur aja ama perasaan lo.
kalo lo seneng,, ya seneng.
kalo lo kesel,, ya kesel.
jangan berakting baek demi perasaan org lain, cos itu bukan nunjukin diri lo yg sebenernya.
JUST BE URSELF!

Nasib UAS

well, spt yang udah sedikit gw sungging eh singgung di atas, gw sekarang lagi UAS.
UAS!
Ujian yang berbobot 50% dari nilai akhir MatKul.
Seteresnya.......melebihi stres UN n US pas masi sekolah, melebihi UTS kemaren *ya iyalah*

n jadwal gw...
29 Januari: Bahasa Inggris (rada susah, tapi gw tetep optimis dapet A buat MatKul 1 ini)
4 Februari: Aljabar Linear (GAMPANG! -gw jujur bgt yak- ya...kalo emg gampang, katakanlah gampang. jangan gampang dibilang susah. susah ape lo? susah nulisnya? *WTF?*)
6 Februari: Matematika Diskrit (SEBENERNYA, soalnya itu...jauh dari perkiraan. bukannya susahnya selangit, tapi malah se-tanah alias gampang banget. seluruh temen gw bersorak gembira abis kelar ujian. gw juga ga nyangka..udah belajar mati2an..eh tau2nya keluarnya cuma kyk gini. zzz... TAPI... lagi-lagi gw melakukan suatu kebodohan yang amat sangat, gw menyesaliny sama kyk gw nyesalin UTP gw dulu. sesuatu yang gampang...jadi bakal berkurang poinnya gara-gara gw salah mengartikan tabel. tapi, palingan juga cuma dikurangin berapa poin gitu. dosen gw kan baek...meski suka tiba2 absen. haha...)
9 Februari (today): PTI! (bahanny lebih sedikit sih daripada UTS kmrn.."cuma" 4 bab. tapi, PG-nya itu loh. mejelimet abis! PGny itu ada pake bahan bab 1-6 loh! sebal! sebenernya, ada kisi2 gitu entah dapet darimana, ada kisi2 PG 68 soal. gw baru tau tadi bbrp menit sblm ujian mulai, jadi gw cuma baca sekilas doang. n lo tau apa yang terjadi? soal PG di ujian SAMA PERSIS -oke, ga semuanya ada di kisi2, tapi sebagian besar iya! alhasil gw mati kutu pas ngeliat tuh soal. nebak2...nginget2 ingatan samar2 pas gw baca tu kertas kisi2..hasilnya, kertas jawaban yang penuh dengan tip-x-an! trus esainya... dari 5 nomer, gw cuma bisa n yakin 3 nmr. 2 lagi? NGARANG! begitulah PTI... baca saja sebentar, pas ujian kita cuma perlu 1 modal: INSPIRASI. HIDUP NGARANG BEBAS!)
10 Februari: B.Indo (gw yakin 100% pasti ada ngarang lagi. dan sekali lagi dibuktikan bahwa...INSPIRASI ITU PENTING! HIDUP INSPIRASI!)
11 Februari (last day): ALGORITMA...*baca pake suara hantu* (ini dia ujian final, palinmg terakhir sekaligus paling menentukan nasih IP semester 1 gw ini. gw udah belajar algo pas mentoring hari sabtu slm +- 5 jam, trus udah belajar slide meski belom hafal2 bener pas hari minggu pagi-siang kemaren. gw harap, kerja keras gw ga sia2. semoga....................u know wat i want!)

1 cerita tentang UAP (Ujian Akhir Pratikum).
gw rasa, kesalahan yang gw buat di UAP jauh lebih fatal daripada di UTP.
tapi, krn gw ga tau apa kesalahanny (yang jelas jumlah eror-ny sampe 5 biji), jadi gw ga se-frustasi spt waktu UTP.
yah, lo tau deh, gmn frustasiny gw pas UTP kemaren yg jelas2 kesalahanny itu kesalahan bodoh. kalo aja gw bener...kalo aja...udah ah. UTP udah lewat, gw dapet 88, sekarang yang perlu ditakutin adalah UAP! hasil UAP sndr baru keluar tgl 12. LAMA BANGET!

Hal yang gw lakuin selama jeda 1 minggu antara 29 Jan-4 Feb

Adalah...
lo liat link blog di kiri?
lo liat ada yang judulnya Stories of Fantasy?
Yup.
Bener!
Selamat, Anda memperoleh hadiah...bisa membaca Fanfic yang gw buat!
hahahaha...

Jadi... sejak bulan des lalu, gw tiba2 dapet inspirasi (lagi2 inspirasi menunjukkan fungsinya) dan hasilnya bisa lo baca di blog itu.
2 fanfic pun lahir...
judulnya Close To You (Yunho's Story) n If (Jaejoong n Aerin -my husband n me-'s story.
Silahkan dibaca...
n jangan lupa komentarnya!

Oke,. back to topic.
selama 1 minggu antara 29 jan-4 feb..
gw membuat 1 fanfic lagi.
eh bukan, tepatnya 2 fanfic.
1 one shot special story CTY aka Close To You, 1 lagi Chaptered.
gw kasi clue deh,, buat fans TVXQ aka Cassiopeia, pasti bisa nebak kenapa gw buat fanfic judulnya Close To You... If...
Jawabannya, pikirkan sendiri. hehe..
nah, ff baru gw yang chaptered ini, lagi2 bertema angst alias ceritanya kompleks n berat.
ratingnya masih +13 sih.
gw ga bisa bikin yg NC 17. apalagi NC 21. Wew~
yang NC 21-nya ntar aja kalo gw udah cukup umur. wakaka...
n lagi-lagi gw mengangkat unsur medis.
bisa dibilang, gw ini org yg maniak hal2 yg berbau medis alias kedokteran, tapi gw jelas2 ga mau jadi dokter.
entahlah mengapa. hohoho...
jadi, kyknya di fanfic2 gw selanjutnya, bakalan berhubungan ama dunian medis. entah settingnya di rumah sakit lah,, tokoh utamanya sakit lah,, bahkan tokoh utamanya sampe mati.
jujur, bikin fanfic yang tokoh utamanya mati itu.. menguras emosi banget.
pas gw ngetiknya, tangan gw langsung dengan bebas n lancar mencet kata2 yang menceritakan kematian padahal hati gw ga kuat kalo bayangin yg sebenernya.
di ending If, pas gw ngetiknya, tangan gw sampe gemeteran.
n kalo misalnya tuh cerita bukan gw yang ngetik ato bukan gw yang buat, pasti gw bakalan nangis. sumpah.
tapi berhubung gw yang ngetik n otomatis gw udah baca tuh cerita puluhan kali (bukannya gw narsis terkagum2 ama cerita buatan sendiri, tapi buat ngedit kalo2 ada yang salah ketik), jadinya gw ga nangis. pengen nangis, tapi air mata ga keluar.
gw jadi mengerti gmn perasaan J.K. Rowling pas dy menggambarkan gmn Sirius Black mati.
ga tega bunuh tokoh sendiri sih, tapi demi tuntutan jalan cerita... akhirnya terpaksa deh.

ya sudahlah, gw cukupin cerita gw hari ini.
gw masih belom ngeprint slide B.Indo buat belajar nih.
belom belajar juga.
gile~ keasikan OL wakaka....

See You next time... whenever...maybe next day, next week, next month, or...next year.
LOL
I'll typing again when i got my type-mood back.
*dasar org moody*
Okay??
CU~

Well guys, Binusmaya has shown my result!!
But Algo's n Indonesian's score still, ugh, haven't be shown >___<

Here's my complete result: (minus algo + Ind)
English : 96
Discrete Math: 85 -->SAVE!!!!! pas2an dapet A nih...kyknya beneran deh switch gue yang bertransformasi jadi gate disalahin ;(
Linear Algebra: 100 -->kyknya si dosen ga ngeliat hasil akhir deh..*ato ga menyadari manipulasi jawaban gue??!* Who knows?
Intro IT: 88
Algo Practical: 89

I'm still waiting for REAL COMPLETE RESULT~
since today (Monday) is holiday, so maybe the result'll be out tomorrow ;)
I'll edit this post soon when the result's there :)
Hoping....hoping............

1 week passed away since i had my mid-exam!
Actually, the result must be in binusmaya, but until now it hasn't appeared yet T_____T
But...........
Some of my lecturer give each result in class time~

So, this is little part of the result:
Algorithm and Programming (Practical)-->yang bikin gue*pake gue aja ah* nangis2 n stress berat krn gue pikir kesalahan gue tuh fatal bgt: ternyata 88!!!! gue sampe teriak2 gejeh ga peduli nasib temen2 gue yang lain yg miris dapet kecil semua, kecuali rombongan Randi cs n Simon cs. gue boleh seneng dong ama hasil ini.hehehe...
English-->gue udah targetin dapet A sih: 92/96 (gue lupa)
PTI or Introduction of Information Technology-->yang bahannya BUANYAK banget, 371 hal: 89!! (sama ama Randi + Charles nih. Tapi gue jelas ga main contek lho ya!! Yang ada nguras otak buat ngarang jawaban esainya..

Others??
It hasn't revealed yet T_____T
Discrete Mathematics: although i have class in last saturday, but he (my lecturer) didn't say anything about giving our result.
Indonesian: The lecturer didn't come so i must wait till next week T_T
Algorithm and Programming (Theoretical): He didn't come without any information before!!! SEBEL!!! since at Tuesday i only have Algo class, then he didn't come?? WTF!!
Linear Algebra: the lecturer was so busy in explaining the material for 2 meetings (next week is offclass, FYI) so he didn't say anything about the result. he only ask that 4# question is little hard to do (agak susah?? sangat susah kali!!!) he amazed me that he can finish explaining 2 meetings materials in only 1 hour!! (1 shift is 100 minutes) It means the time to take lunch is longer :)

So, i'm still hoping that my Discrete Math, algo, and linear alj's result is fine. It means i can get A for all subjects (perfectionist XD).
Remembered that i do Boolean gate for Boolean Switch in Discrete math, do ngasal for pseudocode in algo, and manipulated the number in linear alj XP
hoping...hoping......
if i really got A for all of my subjects, then i can tell Mom so she'll be very happy~

Note: i feel guilty to my friends that i got highest score in English, bcos at the night before d test i still forumming and didn't study. But i'm sure my friends study hard for this test ;)
My auntie comments when i ask my result: harusnya dapetin A tuh gampang soalnya anak Binus kan banyak liburnya.
Yeah, i agree with that. before-mid-test-term i have lots of holiday. then my schedule doesn't full of class (in Wed n Fri i have no class).
But, after-mid-test-term is full of assignments!!
OMG...i still regret why i live in Kelapa Gading, far away from my campus that make me confused when there are team's assignments :(

It means that I have to work harder!!!
Ganbatte!!!
Hwaiting!!!!

PS: Zuna, Tanjoubi Omedetou ne~
jgn lupa traktir sushi XD

As the tittle, I wanna ask about my family.
Correctly, I wanna reveal my family, my big family.

Having a normal family had been my dream. But I think none has a normal family. Although someone has it, he/she is "abnormal" for me. Or maybe I'm just jealous.

My main family consists of Dad, Mom, Nee (older sister), and me.
Just 4 of us.
But right now, my family only consists of 3 members.
Don't think my parents divorce or something bad.
It's because Dad had already been in Heaven.
Dad had been sick since my first year in Junior High School.
Are you shocked??
Actually, only few of my friends who known about this fact. My Junior High School classmate.
Cos it was happening right after my Junior High School's final exam.
Mom said thanks to GOD who made this tragedy happened after my exam, because if it happened when i was on exam, i wouldn't graduate, maybe.
Yeah, this is a fact about my main family.
I never want to ask about this fact to people who asking about "where is your Dad?".
I just answer "with my Mom in Lahat."
I don't want my friends who haven't known it change their attitude to me.
I just want they see me having a normal family.
Maybe it sounds like I'm too "drama queen", childish, or such. But, this is the way I am.
*jadi inget lagu The Way You Are - DBSK XDDD*

My big family, as i stated above, means besides my main family, there are also other families from Dad's side (3 uncles, 1 auntie, and 4 cousins) and from Mom's side (4 uncles, 5 aunties, and 11 cousins).
That's why i stated big family, not family only *ga penting juga*

Now I have a problem about my family.
One of my cousin from Mom's side will getting married on Jan 17th next year.
This was the first wedding in my family (for 3rd generation).
My problem is on the same day i have Final Practical Exam (cos i have to go to campus on Saturday)!!!
It means, when other families (include Mom and Nee who'll come to Jakarta) prepare about this wedding, i may (tragically) kicked to 2nd level to study for exam >.<
When Irene, my other cousin heard this, she cheers me that i can still enjoy the foods..*thinking about it makes me drooling XD*
Yeah, actually, it cheers me enough but i'm still confused about it.
My exam started at 9.20 until 11 AM, but after that i'm still having my last Discrete Mathematics class for this semester until 3 PM so i can't absent for this section.
Oh NOOOOOO~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Yeah, as i posted before, I'm still having mid-exam!!!
Actually, since i have 6 subjects, so i had 6 exam days, one subject for each day.
I also have practical exam at Nov 8th.
For most of you, readers, I've told you how's this exam going >.<
It sooo........that make me wanna jump from 8th level of my campus!!!
But since you, readers, always wait for me, miss, care, and love me, i wouldn't do that, guys!!!
*ditabok*

Well, back to the main topic, my main exam.
This is my schedule:
Nov 18th: Discrete Mathematics
Nov 20th: Linear Algebra
Nov 24th: English
Nov 25th: Introducing Information Technology
Nov 26th: Indonesian
Nov 27th: Algorithm and Programming

Anjriiiittt!!!!!!
4 days full of exams everyday!!!!!
Grrrr..........

Until now, i've finished 2 exams.

First, Discrete Mathematics: The questions make me dizzy and crazy!!!!!!!
I was so stupid that i make Boolean Gate to answer question asking to make switching Boolean!!!
I really hope my lecture doesn't mind since he didn't explain Boolean topic. He just ask us to read it from his fotocopy paper.
Pak, baek dikit ya!!! Kan udah 2 kali ga masuk di pertemuan terakhir, ga jelasin pula. *ngeles*

Second, Linear Algebra: Why are you asking to solve SPL (angkanya pecahan n puluhan boo) with OBE alias Gauss Jordan method???????
Grrrrr.........
There are 4 questions. Question number 1-3 is, yeah, easy enough for me since i believe that Linear Algebra is the easiest subject i have right now (English too).
But, question number 4 make me take lot of time to think.
With full self-confident, i answer it directly with pen! Oh yeah, i forgot to tell you that my Alin lecture asked to answer his questions by using pen only!
Hmm...
Then i try to answer it as teliti as i can.
But.............
In the end, i must count the number at thousands range!!!
So i think to find the answer by using elimination (SMU method XDD), JUST TO KNOW that my long and hard job is correct or not.
AKKKKKHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ternyata, the final answer is only on hundreds range!!!
Hhhh...
I've answered WITH PEN, then my answer is SO far from true answer????!!!!!!!
Yeah, as you predicted (maybe), i re-answer it as fast as i can.
But, fast answer tidak dijamin bener!!
100 minutes to answer all questions is almost over...
Selesai sih jawab ulang, tapi TETEP AJA HASILNYA GA SAMA AMA HASIL ELIMINASI!!!!
FRUSTRATED!!!!!
Ting tong!
The time is over.
Gw pun terpaksa keluar meski terpaksa bgt *pengen tetep di kelas tp udah diusir ama yg jaga dgn ancaman bakal dikurung kalo ga keluar2 juga* Nope, I'm just kidding XDDDD
Yeah, untuk kedua kalinya, i hope my "lovely" lecture doesn't mind with the final answer, but points it from the way i do it >.<

Right now, I'm still counting star in the sky *halah* eh still waiting for the next exams...

I'm so frustrating with this exams since someday ago my mother started send SMS: (this already translated in English since ga mungkin nyokap gw ngomong pake inggris XDD)
Mother: Hey is there any beasiswa in Binus??? Or beasiswa for students who don't have lots of money (keluarga ga mampu geto)??? (di kampus Nee ada tuh beasiswa buat keluarga ga mampu)
I: Nope, there isn't. beasiswa only for students who have IP above 3,5.
Mother: Really?? Masak g ada beasiswa buat keluarga krg mampu??
I: Yupe. Beasiswa is only for Coem Laud students. *sorry i don't know how to write "kumlaut" in English*
Mother: Hmm... so can you achieve that??? Get IP 3,5??
I: I don't know. It is still processing.... >.<
*I really translate it cos my mother ga mungkin send SMS with English and her language is more difficult to understand for orang normal XDDD

Those SMS really make me frustrated with exams!!
Yeah, u pasti know how's the feeling of a child who only have a mother to work and earn money.

I'll work hard, guys!!!!

Alohaaaaaa~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I come back~~~~~

Ehm2...
Rada serem nih ama reader2 yang menagih gw buat update blog XDDD

Mian......
Gomen ne, minna...

Selama bulan Oktober, gw lagi stuck n ngerasa bosen ama blog *digetok*
Jadi gw ga update...

Nah, kalo November ini, gw disibukkan oleh tugas2 Binusmaya yang menumpuk plus UTS!!!!!
Yeah, anyway, i'm still on UTS days right now ;(

Tapi, gw jadi semangat buat ngeblog hari ini XDD
Sebagai bayaran HIATUS sebulan lebih, gw bakal cerita banyak deh kali ini....

Info baru: berhubung gw mulai menyadari kalo kemampuan Inggris gw menurun *halah*...
Jadi gw bakal mencoba posting dalam bahasa Inggris!!!!!
Moga2 deh ga bakal kacau balau kyk bule baru belajar Bahasa Indonesia XDD